I used to be so in love, in truth, that I feverishly realized tips on how to learn the charts of others and interpret transits, all from the convenience of my laptop. And finally, I used to be fortunate sufficient to show this ardour for astrology right into a full-time job. However at some point, within the midst of the 2020 lockdown, after I sat down at my desk and tried to put in writing my month-to-month horoscopes, I discovered myself unable to sort. I used to be bewildered, however I assumed, eh, let’s simply give it a few days. Days became weeks which became months and I could not even carry myself to observe the transits for my very own private use, not to mention for public consumption.
It was devastating, and horrifying, because it wasn’t simply my profession that was on the road, it felt as if this observe that I had fallen so deeply in love with had abruptly damaged up with me, with no closure. After months of tears and anger, I had no selection however to maneuver on. I finished trying to put in writing horoscopes, closed my reserving web site for readings, and mourned my relationship with astrology and the planets I assumed I knew so properly.
However one thing sudden occurred. I discovered myself noticing the altering phases of the moon on my walks with my canine, feeling into no matter emotion got here up, with out fixating on what signal it was in. It was so profound to simply really feel the solar on my face, open to no matter pleasure it had in retailer for me, quite than analyzing what the transits needed to say about benefiting from the day. I might expertise a profound emotional breakthrough inside my private therapeutic work, solely later to be informed by a pal in passing that there was an eclipse that very day.
I slowly got here to know that the planets had not damaged up with me, they only needed me to expertise them quite than simply research them. They had been speaking to me on a regular basis, able to share their knowledge with me, if I might solely simply decelerate sufficient to listen to them. They had been with me each step of the best way, even when I finished monitoring them on an app. And I found what it’s like to simply be within the current second with the planets, in the appropriate right here, proper now, of my mystical journey, observing their magic in awe and marvel, quite than simply look in the direction of them to foretell the long run.
I do not know what all of this implies for my astrology observe shifting ahead, I simply know that it’ll by no means be the identical. I can’t wrap this expertise in a neat and tidy bow as I as soon as hoped that I might, and I hope I by no means will. But when I’ve realized one factor it’s this—quite than wanting down at my cellphone demanding quick solutions, I’ll select to search for on the sky and ask infinite questions as an alternative.